No matter what house party you go to, they all have one thing in common – the music. The songs played at the party can make or break your entire night, and more often than not, the latter is true. Being the observant people that we are, we’ve noticed that all party music somehow evolves through the night in ways you may not have noticed before.
The elevator music: For some reason, when the party begins, the host wants to act all sophisticated and play instrumental versions of every song ever. You are transported to a Mughlai restaurant with servers as old as the Mughal era. The hosts actually expect people to mingle, paying no heed to the fact that the music is making everyone drowsy.
The sophisticated: Taking the posh-ness to another level, the person in charge of music will start discussions about musicians you’ve never heard of and try to make you listen to all of them, all the while talking over the music. Nod along and smile, or they’ll probably never change the song.
The techno: Someone grabs the AUX cord (finally!) but oh no, they want to play music that sounds like Nokia phones being murdered in a blender. It’s not as bad as the music played earlier but my god, why does everything sound like Transformers being set on fire? All that’s missing is a little bit of Bob Marley’s music trap-ified and some flashing lights, and you have a full on rave.
The commercial: The liquor has set in at this point and literally any kind of music will do but this is the point the music actually gets lit! Someone has judged the ambience and started playing music everyone can dance and sing along to. The most pop of tracks with a humongous dose of Punjabi rap will be played and this is when everyone joins in, even the indie snobs. Except ‘Closer’ by The Chainsmokers, everyone hates Closer.
The Shady: This is the point where you understand no one at the party knows what their own capacity is. The words are slurring and YouTube has been accessed. Believe you me, when I say, the night will get shady. From Bhojpuri songs that talk about ‘Maxi Par Sexy Samaan’ to cringe pop that has no place even in the depths of hell. But at least you can all laugh together about the absurdity of it all.
The sad: The closing moments of the party are here and the only people left standing are the people who have some kind of qualm with the universe. As people start to trickle out, old Bollywood songs where the hero sings of pain become the staple. Kishore Kumar, Kumar Sanu, Pankaj Udas – you name it. And you’ll get to hear a lot of ‘wahs’ and explanations of the lyrics, and somehow your buzz is allowing you to appreciate it all. It’s been a great party.