Tryst, naam toh suna hi hoga? Tryst is that to clubs, what GoT is to TV series’. All these new clubs popping up in Mumbai are fancy and tempting, but in ‘Tryst you will Trust’. It’s that iconic. So try and spend an evening in there, for you drunk fucks owe it to the nightlife of Mumbai.

Being a townie comes with a peculiar set of perks and a giant hole in your wallet. The primary advantage is all the exemplary and exorbitant hangout places to throng. Yeah, the bills might just fucking kill you a little, but mostly they’re all fucking worth it.

One such spot I always wanted to visit, was Tryst. With all the buildup, I was exploding with anticipation. My excitement was so much, I once yelled and I quote: “fuckers, if you guys bail on me again, I will go to Tryst alone and pay the bloody stag money, but only after strangling y’all.” (LMAO, you think? I might just actually kill them, but pay the stag fee? Kiss my ass!)

So one fine Saturday, we all show up at Phoenix. Bee Tee Dubs: If you think you’ll be overdressed in a designer dress with a cape and CK heels, you’re WRONG! Tryst is way above that. 18 year old’s are adorning Gucci and Designer couture in there, for real.

The security guards all look the same, scary and tall. I am in a 5 inch heel and hello, I still have to look 75 degrees upwards to see their face. They are also pretty rude. But that’s okay, for your fragile townie ego needs something to deflate it once in a while. When they seal Tryst’s name onto your hand, the moment is precious; it’s a moment of glory. Soak it all in!

Heads up 2: Stuff in there is shit expensive. Like fuck-you-poor-people expensive. So unless you are actually willing to spend a couple of thousands as cover charge, you might want to come here a little tipsy. Food here is moderately priced, but drinks like any other club would cost you your dark soul. Don’t you worry, don’t you worry child, town has got a plan for you. There are at least 20 liquor shops on your way here.

Warning number 3: Be ready to fight a battle at the bar counter. It’s so fucking crowded. Half this place is filled with young, college going brats who are either super tall or wear super uncomfortable high heels. Both ways, harmful for your health.

The lighting is so kickass; it will give you pseudo Coachella feels. It’s pretty obvious that we, shameless assholes, can’t even afford a Tomorrowland pass; so let it sink in if you fall in the same category as us.

Where? Skyzone, Phoenix Mill Compound, High Street Phoenix, Senapati Bapat Marg, Lower Parel