A typically tacky name board with a tinge of classy written over it will give you positive vibes about Swagat Dining Bar, also hinting out to you that this isn’t just another shady bar. Read on…
Big shady things come in open roof-top packages
You step foot inside Swagat Dining Bar only to realize that the waiters have got the most obvious brief in the world right. *You work in a place called ‘Swagat’. If it doesn’t strike you to welcome your guests politely, it’s like not striking you to have sex when you’re carrying a condom.*
So, I brushed the obvious beginning aside as a ‘so what, show me more!’ because yes, I have a certain standard of my own when it comes to SHADY, and it’s anything but SLIM! *I just puked on my own pun there*
Now waiter saheb insists that I go upstairs with a wry smile on his face. He had never seen me at Swagat before (he was right), and he looked like he had something interesting waiting for me up there. *What can be so interesting in a fucking AC hall I wondered, before I began to take the flight up. If anything, it will only diminish my shady feels. Why am I doing this, I question my actions!*
I rubbed my eyes as I walked upstairs because guess what, I could suddenly see the fucking sky out of nowhere. Whaaaaaaaaaa! A shady bar with an open-air rooftop? Booooooyaaaaah! If this is not a ‘FIND’, then what is? Speaking of condoms, If I found a whole pack in my pocket at that moment, I’d probably have felt less happier than I was when I saw a roof-top shady bar.
Before you come to terms with reality, you’re on a terrace full of drunk fucks, with a view of the Western Express Highway and a giant advertising hoarding staring down your face, almost like it can squish the fuck out of you anytime it wants if it feels like falling down.
The waiters here are plenty in number, and are quick to adhere to your cheap drinking and chakna centric needs. Whether they do a good job of it is a different story altogether.
Let me paint you the real picture –Boiled Chana and Chicken Lasooni Kebab to go with your Old Monk on the rocks, with the Bombay breeze hitting your face and a sky full of stars above your head – this entire package costing you not more than 350 bucks. Sigh!
The only thing that can annoy the fuck out of you here are the mosquitoes, who are literally talking to you with their bites, saying that you can’t live this shady bar dream without paying a price. The price of a mosquito bite, I don’t mind. The price of a dengue or malaria hospital bill, I do mind. So Swagat needs to get their mosquito repellent act together!
While bidding adieu to Swagat Dining Bar, you know you’re going to go back there again with a bigger group of friends to get drunk under the sky.
You’re going to spread the word about this ‘find’ like a fucking epidemic. Among other things, you will wonder if the advertising hoarding is going to change, if the waiters will be more attentive next time, if the breeze will still carry its magic, and most importantly, if the mosquitoes would still be around to give you their ‘welcome’ bites.
This is a neat drinking place with inert shady bar characteristics. This is not a dream. Or is it? #Win
Where? Near Vakola Police Station, Western Express Highway, Vakola, Santacruz East
