Tells you why ‘love at first sight’ is a fucking sham
They say ‘Big things come in small packages’. The Den in Khar is small, but is nowhere close to delivering anything big. And if you’re a guy, they take keen interest in your cock. Oh this is going to be fun! *Rubs hands*
‘The Den’ has that aura of a quaint place you might want to hit up when you just want to chill over alcohol and have some peaceful conversation. It also has all the makings to live up to being a place like that. Unfortunately, the place ends up digging its own grave, even before their waiters bring you your first order of the evening; in our case, our first and last order of the evening.
You open the door to enter ‘The Den’, only to be charmed by its first impression, let aside the lovely outdoor arrangement. Once you’re in, the first thing you will see is a beautifully arranged bar, some neatly placed wall art, and a vibrant, ‘feel-good’ look on the whole. You take your seat thinking that you’ve made a good decision for a change, amid all the horrible decisions you usually make in your life.
However, this quickly turned into yet another horrible decision for us, probably the most forgettable one we’ve made in our bar drinking adventures. To our misfortune, we have to relive the experience to bring this to you… You can thank us later.
Soon after you settle down, you realize that the tables are too closely arranged for comfort, almost making you feel like an integral part of your neighboring table conversation. We heard a combination of relationship problems on one side and casual flirting on the other. The people on those tables were so engrossed in their respective conversations, that they didn’t realize how slow the fucked-up service was.
We were fuck hungry, so we thought of ordering some food first, before we took our time to look at the bar menu. Don’t get the Leakers wrong. Our intention was to get piss drunk, and we were supposed to be in for the long haul that evening…
But Alas, things were only set to go downhill from there. Our waiter was an absolute doofus. He never seemed interested to serve us in the first place. They offer free WiFi, but he gave us the cold shoulder when we asked him for the fucking password, and he even didn’t give us a heads up on how long the order would take to reach our table, until we asked him. How long does it take to prepare a fucking sandwich for chrissake?
The music, mostly retro, was too loud for a miniscule space like this. The interior designer didn’t think it through, did he? Or he probably never asked the right questions. Our ear-drums had to bear the brunt for his lack of professionalism.
Their bar has high chairs supported by mannequin-esque legs, with heels. Yes, actual legs! It looks disgustingly weird, and it basically offers you a crotch cum hip to sit on. Can’t paint a picture? Let us just leave a picture here for you…
This is where it gets ugly – The guys over at ‘The Den’ try to get cocky in the men’s restroom. As you go about doing your business, you stare into a sign that reads – “Our aim is to keep this restroom clean. Gentlemen, your aim will help. Stand closer; it’s shorter than you think”. How clever!
*Hello ‘The Den’. If you’re talking about my penis, let me tell you that it doesn’t deserve your shit pot. Oh, and why are you feeling shy to call my cock? Why say “it”? You have dicks walking around serving people in your bar, after all. You, of all people, shouldn’t be embarrassed.*
And so, what started off on a rather good note ended up being a fucking waste of a night! We didn’t even bother calling for drinks. I could pee on them right now; and it wouldn’t matter if my ‘it’ was small or large.
There’s nothing more infuriating than bad service!
Where? Ground Floor, Prabhat Kunj, 24th Road, Off Linking Road, Khar West
