Zoo Bar

Call it a ‘Zoo’, and people are going to behave like animals

This is a tale of a birthday, a spilled drink and an obnoxious cow. Read on…

Call it animal instinct if you must, but I had my doubts about a place called ‘Zoo Bar’. Unfortunately, it was a friend’s birthday; so the only thing I could do was arrive after everyone else, just to be safe.

First things first: The location is a joke. First Khar and now, Vile Parle. I understand that the ‘burbs are overly populated and hence are running out of space to do literally anything. But railway station roads under skywalks, really? Also Vile Parle, stop trying to happen please? You will never be Juhu.

Coming back to the zoo, sorry, ‘bar’ that I was at, I realized why it was named as such. The joint was so bloody crowded that it was a veritable zoo in there. A zoo where the animals had taken over, that is.

I found my friends after three rounds of trying to call and yell over the music which I don’t normally do. Once at the table, I looked around for a server to place my order. Before I get into what happened next, here’s a PSA (Public Service Announcement, for the uninitiated) – Everyone. Stop. Wearing. Black. Now. I gave my drink order to 3 random guys, who couldn’t get in a word to tell me they don’t work here, before I found the man I was looking for.

Now, drink firmly clutched in hand, I settled down when the clock struck 11:30 PM – dance time. Thus began the Bollywood and British Bhangra beats but with the ugly twist of ‘remix’. DJ, yeah right. Just play the songs the way they are supposed to be played, will you?

The birthday came and went, and I was itching to leave too; but as I returned from the bar with my last drink of the night, the unimaginable happened. As I minded my way and tried to ensure I do not touch too much of the dancing crowd, a woman, who in my opinion, was already occupying more space on the planet than she deserved, pushed past me roughly, managing to shove me to the side and send my drink flying through the air! The stunner though is this – she walked off! No profuse apologies. She just walked off!

Being the polished person that I am, I sputtered and walked away instead of swearing and pulling her hair out and making her pay for my now ruined dress. However, I had had it. I kissed my friend good bye and walked out. Not before I drove my 5 inch stiletto heel into the rude cow’s little toe on my way out. Accidently of course. 😉
(My flipping her off may have given it away, though.)

Zoo Bar, you need crowd control.

Where? 1st Floor, Liberty Lodge, Dashrathlal Joshi Rd, Vile Parle West, Mumbai, Maharashtra 400056

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