As kids, we all loved weddings. They would make you feel a rush of excitement and you would actually look forward to them. But now, as twenty somethings, weddings aren’t as fun anymore. As amazing as million relatives constantly going “ab teri baari” sounds is, there’s only one legit factor that can make weddings bearable and that’s alcohol. Here’s proof.
You can hang out at the open bar: Usually you are forced to sit next to the mandap that heroically emerges from thick smoke, making breathing hard and your tolerance for wedding shenanigans low. But once the bar counter is open, you know where to go.
You may actually find someone interesting: Drinking brings people together. That cute dude who otherwise would stand 500 meters away from you at all times might actually turn up at a chair next to yours. Who knows where that will go? At least you know he’s acceptable enough to be invited to the wedding. That’s a relief.
It lightens up the mood: When all the aunties and uncles activate their prospective groom/bride scanners along with finding errors in rituals radar, alcohol is the only thing that can make things slightly better. Let’s admit it, the sangeet is mostly enjoyable because of alcohol.
That’s the one thing people don’t crib about it: Food – ‘yaaar, Sharma’s daughter’s wedding ki shahi paneer was better’. Decoration – ‘white lilies would have looked better than light purple ones’. Daaru is the magical property that nobody has complaints about. Unless you run out of it. Then you are in for a serious problem.
Things end soon: This is the masterplan for my wedding – invest all the money I can in booze and get all my relatives drunk. The sooner they pass out, the better. I will make sure that nobody stands to see the vidai and make a huge scene out of it. Yeh mera vaada hai.
